A Huge Pain in the Butt

I don’t know about you but when I was growing up, my parents and mentors taught me right from wrong and they didn’t mince words.  From then on, my conscience has been what some people would call “A Huge Pain in the Butt!”

I’m not by any means suggesting that I never make a wrong decision but I am saying that when I do, it never ends well.  Even if no one else finds out, my stomach churns with guilt and I have to share what happened with someone else.  I need to sort through what I did and how I can make it right.

The Problem

Today, there are more opportunities than ever to hurt others without anyone else finding out what you did.  Steal an identity.  Use a credit card that isn’t yours to buy awful things.  Even make comments on websites that are extremely hurtful or filled with lies.  Once you start, it is hard to quit because that conscience gets to be less of a pain.  No one is there to tell you it’s wrong and no one may ever learn it was you.

Unfortunately, it isn’t as unusual as we would like to believe.  It’s scary to think of how many people seem to “enjoy” hurting others when they know they can’t be accused for this wrong doing.

The Challenge

Be the one who stands up to these temptations even when it seems so easy to just play along.  Believe it or not, every smeared reputation has a name and a face.  What if next time, that face is yours or the face of someone you love?  It’s worth it to listen to that “Huge Pain in the Butt”.  You’ll be thankful later.

/by

After the WALK ON THE MOON

For months, Erik and I have had my eye on only one project.  We have been preparing every step towards it.  We even decided to refer to this project as our WALK ON THE MOON.  We had our Apollo program and our Mercury program.  It was an incredibly fun and intelligent way to chart our path to this extremely exciting new development.

Our project was a success and will be useful in our professional future but what will be next?  Now that our WALK ON THE MOON is complete, there is this fog of leftover projects that I had previously put aside.  They are not in any particular order of importance, just not as important as our WALK ON THE MOON.

What Now?

For many days after, it seemed I would just stare at my computer screen knowing there was so much to do to catch up but having absolutely no idea of where to start again.  I felt like there was so much that needed to be done right away.  Because I had no idea where to start, I would find myself organizing my office or making phone calls instead of actually making progress.

The creative plan for the last project had so much organized detail on what was to be done.  It was also flexible enough to allow for family emergencies and vacation days.  At first, I didn’t want to put in the time to make something like that again but yesterday I realized it was absolutely vital.

The Next Mission

I wrote out all of the professional projects I had set aside and started piecing together what was necessary and what was possible.  Pretty soon, I started to see a pattern that made sense and a light at the end of the fog.

There were questions I asked myself about the plan for these professional projects:

  • What does a normal day look like? For example: When do the kids get home?  When do I get up?
  • What is absolutely set in stone on any given day? For example: My family needs to eat three meals.
  • Where are the holes for things that don’t HAVE to get done? For example: My kids have time for homework in the evening when I need to be available but could make that time useful to me by reading emails as well.
  • What does each professional project time frame appear to be? Is this a multi-day project, a single-day project or a partial-day project?
  • Where will I take vacation days or maybe hours?
  • Now, fill in the holes.

Honestly, it looks like I may be caught up by mid December.  Still, at least there is a plan and when I complete each step, I can feel accomplished and deserving of that glass of red wine at night.  I can also feel a clear head about what the goals are for tomorrow.

This new plan was not a small project but it will be worth it.  There is still much to be done but the fog has lifted!

/by

The Bully in the Beach Chair

A dear friend and spiritual mentor of mine has assured me again and again that God does indeed have a sense of humor or He wouldn’t have created us with that ability.  Makes sense right?

Old View

Many times in my life I have said “God created me for His own entertainment.”  Whenever there are small almost humorous issues such as my daughter being as overly dramatic as her mother or my son almost being born on Tax Day, I have seen God laughing from above.  In slightly larger issues too like when my entire family got lice even though I am a complete clean freak or when flying squirrels were found scurrying around in the attic right after we bought our dream home.

For some reason I pictured Him high above with a soda on a beach chair enjoying every minute of my struggles.  I’m not sure where in the world that came from, maybe too many sitcoms.  Still, the point was that I saw Him as laughing AT me.  This vision did not show a supposedly loving creator who wanted the best for me.  To me it revealed God as a bully who had no intention of carrying me through the rough times but rather basking in the humor that may indeed come from each one.  No wonder I found it so hard to believe He would ever heal me from my epilepsy.

New View

However, lately my perception of God has been changing dramatically.  Oh, God is still laughing, maybe harder than ever.  But I am right there laughing WITH Him as we walk through this crazy world side by side.  When silly things happen or even difficult things such as painful injuries from a recent fall.  I feel a new ability to ask Him to help me find a way to laugh through it and He does.

The man with the beach chair and soda is no more.  Now somehow a kind person full of wisdom with a light heart encourages me to see things here as temporary.  He points out the small things to smile about like new flowers blooming in our yard and the deer that will devour them the next day.  He chuckles at a comment from my ever entertaining kids that sounds a little too much like a quote from Friends they may have overheard when I didn’t know they were listening.

Check for Yourself

Do you see God as laughing WITH you or AT you?  I know too many of us out there still see the bully in the beach chair.  When small yet frustrating things pop up suddenly in your day, do you stay angry and feel like someone must be enjoying your sorrow?  If so, work on changing that picture of the God.  He really will point out the humor in our world and laughs at it WITH you.

Give yourself permission to laugh knowing you are not alone in that sly giggle.  Admit to yourself, the due date you misread for your work report is not the end of the world as we know it.  This change in your understanding of God’s sense of humor may not come quickly or even easily. Still, when you have that new picture of God, I promise you…it will change how you respond to all life’s challenges.

/by
,

Act How You Want to Be Treated

When I was younger, I had some pretty uncomfortable experiences with tests taken for my epilepsy. I don’t recall a lot of specifics. It’s like my brain has blurred yet escalated those memories. I can tell you for sure that the letters EEG and MRI cause me to clench up and revert to childlike behavior. I just can’t seem to get over how awful my first associations with those tests were.

Recently, my doctor asked me to have both those tests done again. I was NOT happy. It took me a while to admit to myself that this would be helpful. It took me even longer to convince myself that many things have changed since I was younger and it may be much different now.

At The Office

When I first walked in for the tests, I realized I felt like a frightened child and I felt disabled. Worse yet, I realized I was acting like a frightened child who had a disability. I was talking quietly and not standing up straight. This wasn’t me. I’m a college educated, happily married, mother of two and a professional speaker. Still, that was not what I was presenting myself as to the staff at the medical office on this morning.

The Real Difference

As soon as I realized the image I was projecting was so far from the person I had grown to be, I changed my demeanor immediately. When Patti, the tech performing the tests, started to ask me questions about my family and profession; my answers would be believable. Now, I was backing those positive stories about my wonderful marriage and adorable kiddos with every other element of my communication. My voice was confident and my questions were asked intelligently. When there was pain because of the tests, I explained what I was feeling to Patti but didn’t over-react. Things would be different then years ago because I am a different person.

The Question

When you get upset about how someone else treats you, ask yourself: “Are you acting like the person you want to be treated as?” WOW! That is a tough one to swallow. All of the sudden the responsibility is yours. More importantly, the opportunity to be treated as a better, stronger individual is in your hands. Whether anyone else notices it or not, when you decide to exhibit the traits of who you want to be treated like, you will treat yourself better. You will be empowered to get through whatever tests present themselves today because you know what makes you strong and you are prepared to share them with the world.

/by
,

Laugh Your Way to Teamwork

An Unusual Event
This morning, when my kids heard that we were having eggs for breakfast, they both offered to help.  Kadence wanted to cut the bacon and Kemuel wanted to crack the eggs.  I was admittedly shocked.  Lately, when they hear egg are on the menu, they groan.  Also, I have asked them if they want to help many time and it is extremely rare that they are interested in cooking.  I may not make it look like much fun since I tend to be stressed out in the kitchen.  In any case, I was convinced something must have changed in order for breakfast today to be so unique from other days.

The Theory
I thought about how yesterday had been different.  I recalled that after school the previous day, I had allowed both of my kids to laugh for a good half hour after the got home.  Then, it was time for homework and we muddled through together.  At dinner time, our entire family laughed for what seemed like hours at the dinner table after everyone had happily cleaned their plates.  We laughed about math, weather…even burping.  We were pretty worn out by the end but the positive energy continued to flow even after the family comedy session.

Plans for Further Tests
Honestly, everyone in our house is an entertainer on some level so the laughter flows pretty freely in the Anderson family.  Still, yesterday seemed to be an extra special fill of giggles.  I had to wonder if this energy may have poured over to today and caused the enthusiasm for helping in the kitchen.  I shared this with Erik and he found it interesting as well.  Next time we clean house, we will plan for a family comedic pre-show.  I think that may be just what we need to have enthusiasm for working together on chores.  If so, bring on those laughs!

/by

Too Much Information

I admit it, I’m a hypochondriac.  If I hear about some kind of new illness, I will worry about getting it and my brain may even start to come up with symptoms similar to what I was reading about recently.  Erik warns me to stay off of www.webmd.com but I don’t always take his advice.

I thought it was a great step forward when pharmaceutical companies were able to advertise drugs directly to consumers and then, I started watching them.  Can you believe how many side effects there are?  I am so thankful I rarely watch broadcast television or I may be having my own side effects from those ads.

A Lesson for Me
A lesson I am learning from all of this is that sometimes, there is just too much information available.  I am old enough to remember a time when there wasn’t a digital source available to look up answers to any and every question in the world.  Now, I look back and see that it was easier not to worry about the little stuff then.  It was easier to have your mind wander to simple, pleasant items such as what was going to be growing out in the garden in the morning.  If you didn’t have the option to learn what the worst case scenario was on your own, you weren’t caught wondering if you were going to be the 1% who got the worst end of the lab tests.

A Reminder as a Parent
As I raise my kids, I know they will have access to all of this information also.  When they have a question, they will be able to get “the answer” quickly.  They won’t be forced to just put it aside and continue focusing on the simple things that they know for certain such as bike riding in the cul de sac and family dinners.  There is just too much information available to take their thoughts on a tour of the terrible.

Questions for the Future
Is it good information?  Is it helpful to our life focus?  By having all of our questions answered, are we truly in a better place emotionally or do we lose control of our thoughts entirely?  I’m beginning to wonder if we are headed for a very dark place.  As you look for answers in this digital world each day, make sure to ask yourself these questions and protect your thoughts in the process.

/by

A New Definition of Adventure

“Adventure” is a word that brings up different pictures for everyone.  What does it mean for you?  Do you see it as good or bad?  Scary or exciting?  Standing on the wings of a biplane or in an ambulance at the supermarket?

When I first googled “Adventure”, I was surprised at what I found for a definition: “an unusual and exciting, typically hazardous, experience or activity”.  At that moment, my mind was flooded with possibilities as to what could be considered an adventure.

Because of that new perspective, I didn’t simply see a man climbing Mt. Everest.  Now, I see myself looking back on difficult health issues that I have come through in triumph.  I realize how we have all been through adventures in this life and we should give ourselves credit for our achievements!

Wisdom Already Gained
Our adventures are not just struggles from the past or accomplishments that do not apply in the present.  They are events that have given us valuable wisdom for the future.  We have the option to forget what those adventures have taught us but we lose so much treasure that has already been discovered if we do.

Use the Past for a Better Future
You may be dreaming of what amazing feats you could do “someday” or looking at others with judgement who have survived the impossible.  However, it will help you much more to look back through your own life.  Look and see what “hazardous experiences or activities” you have overcome.  Give yourself credit for your achievement and see what you learned from that adventure that can equip you for tomorrow.

You are much more equipped for the future than you realize.  If you triumphed over a difficult time in life, you know what you needed in order to come out on top of that adventure.  What did you learn during that time and how can it be a benefit for your adventure today?

 

/by

What is “New”?

What does “new” mean?  Is new good or bad?  I would venture to suggest that “new” is both good and bad.  It has a lot to do with how we choose to view it.  “New” may mean Windows upgraded again and now we have to relearn how we spend 10 hours of our day.  “New” may mean our customers have found a competitors’ product to replace what we have been selling them for years.  “New” may also mean a door has opened for a dream to come true that had been long determined as impossible.

There has been a lot of “new” for Erik and me lately in multiple areas.  Many times over the past month we have simply had to stop and remind ourselves of what hasn’t changed because so much has changed so quickly.  Our biggest challenge, aside from keeping up with all of it, has been taking the time to see the good in what is “new” in our lives.

Both of us regularly will take an interesting life update that led to a hospital trip or a large purchase at the local Home Depot, as useful material for the stage.  So anything new for us can mean more stories to share!  This is a great way for anyone to see the good in what may be “new” in your life.  Anytime we can step back and find a reason to smile or laugh at what is now different from before, we give ourselves an opportunity to recognize the amazing possibilities that come with what is new and we also can remember the importance of what has stayed constant through that change.

What is “new”in your world today?  New child?  New job?  New health challenge?  How have you decided to approach what comes as “new” to you?  What stories will you choose to share from what is “new”?

/by